It is hard for me to explain but I guess here is my best. The world is my home. We understand each other. It’s where I feel safe, emotionally and physically, and most alive.

Being home is difficult for me because relationships and people confuse me in America. There is a lot of strange things - Passive aggression, miscommunication, people not asking for what they want/need, resentment without communicating it, fears that people won’t try to understand but let it guide their every moment.

I feel so comfortable in the world - Spontaneously floating through each new situation. I adapt so quickly because I am fully aware, fully awake. I don’t have the endless comfort that numbs my intelligence. The comfort that gives me too much freedom to be in my thoughts, not in the world. When I am in the world, I am just reacting, just observing, just living. When I am home, I am playing a chess game with people who don’t even know why they’re playing it. I am surrounded by people not living the life that they should be, even though they know what they should be doing. I am surrounded by distraction, by complaining, by victims to circumstances out of their control or things that happened in their past that they will not work through. I am surrounded by people that think that money will solve their problems or give them the happiness they cannot otherwise find on their own. I am surrounded by people that think being busy means you are being productive, or doing the right thing in that manner. People that don’t have the attention span to listen to poetry, to read long letters, to create unique art, to share long conversations, to truly be there for people.

It’s strange to me - I feel so much more at home in situations that probably look to others to be so complex. To be dangerous. But, in those situations, I have found the true honesty and genuine nature of all humans. When comfort is stripped away, people must be intentional and straight forward with their words and their actions. And when people are straight forward with what they mean, you at least know where you stand and how to react.

Then people judge you on who you truly are, not just who they think you are.