Fear is a natural part of my life and something that I try to always be in control of, but it would be superhuman of me to think that I can live a life completely free of it. Fear to me is the black lining of life, the devil on your shoulder, the pain that causes you to seek that which is greater. It is the puddle of mud that you stepped in years ago, and though you have cleansed your body from the mud that was on your skin, there is still a stain of it on the bottom of your pant leg that you don’t think about until the next time you see a puddle. Then, all those feelings came back, that you have completely forgotten about because you haven’t looked at the bottom of your pants in a long time. But fear to me is not acting like that stain is not there. It is knowing and appreciating that stain because, because of it, you were able to be smarter and navigate all the puddles that you came across since then. That doesn’t mean that you won’t stir up feelings of pain when you see a puddle again… It means you are now smarter and more aware, and need that fear to work through you so you can let it go.
You need to find someone that can appreciate that stain for what it is. Not expect you to just buy new pants and forget all about it - because that stain made you the person they fell in love with.